I was sitting here, and I have to admit that this is in a slightly devious mindset, so motive is not pure, but I've been in a battle royal with my family. My parents are self proclaimed liberals who had a terrible time with me coming out. THEN.... on top of it I have a grandma, who while growing up was non-religious, but as I got older became more so. Every birthday there were the "jesus loves you" birthday cards etc.
Until I turned 30. She had a heart attack. I told her i planned to come visit her. For my 30th birthday I got a birthday card that said I was not welcome in her home because of my lifestyle (you know the boring gay partnered thing - not the swinging coke snorting straight variety...)
For more than 5 years I ignored her card. At my sisters wedding she came up to talk to me like everything was fine. I was there with my partner who she greeted politely, then considered part of the evil gay agenda.
I finally broke. A couple of weeks ago I called her up and had it out with her.
It wasn't pretty and I'm not proud of things I said to her. but she is being a bigot.
My parents defend her, which is completely unbelievable. When I was 8 we moved into a new house and i learned the N word on the playground in the context of "I hope you don't let any XXXXX into your new house." Keep in mind I grew up in lily white country. The closest thing we hade to non-white were basques. (not saying basques are non-white, just saying no blacks, latinos, hispanics, american indians etc.)
My mom when heairng my repeat this grabbed me by the ear and and read me the riot act. She told me I was not welcome in THEIR house if I was to use that language and nor was any one else who did.
So now my grandmother talks about my "lifestyle" and how against god it is and she is welcomed in their household?
Hypocrisy? I think so.
So there is this part of me that wonders if all of the "Jesus loves you" cards (we're talking a good ten years worth) are worth some PFLAG compensation. I don't commonly believe in signing people up for stuff they don't want, but I certainly didn't want the jesus shit she sent me at least 3 times a year (easter, b-day, christmas).
I don't know.....what do you think? I'm tempted. I have an ethical part that says that she doesn't want it and to leave it alone, but there's another part that says she might learn something.
what say you?